Saturday, May 4, 2013

M-O-T-H-E-R

With only two weeks away from Mother's Day...I know that I will find myself unusually busy and sit down to type a few words that would give my mother justice for the occasion. My youngest daughter will be graduating next week with a Master's in English. Many sacrifices have been made in order to afford her the needed tuition and then some. My mind goes back to all the financial sacrifices my mother and daddy must have made for me and my siblings as we were growing up. Not wanting to go to the store and buy a ton of groceries this morning, I take inventory of items I have to prepare an OK lunch for my husband and I. I see that I can easily make some egg salad sandwiches with chips on the side. As I stand peeling the eggs, I think about all the egg salad and grilled cheese sandwiches my mother made for all of us through the years and wondered if it was because of the convenience or the need. I remembered back to all the groceries, clothing, gas money, gifts that she made sure my family and others had plenty of. I recall a day when she fist married my stepfather Yates. They had come to pick me up at my house for a trip up to my sister's who lived in another town. I had just received my bank statement in the mail and was attempting to balance my account. Our son had just entered college and things were a little tight around the household. Frustrated at an error I had found in my statement and leaving me with a little less than I had originally thought, I jumped into the car feeling anxious. As most mothers do, she took one look at my face and asked "what's wrong?" I told her the details and before I could finish she said, "Wait a minute!" Don't you know that I have plenty, and if you have a need all you have to do is ask?" So many times, she has been there for me. Even though she is alive; she breathes, sees, talks, laughs, and moves, the part that once was my mother is becoming further and further away and I miss her; I long for her. I will never forget my mother for the giant of a person she was and attempted to raise each of her children to be. The following poem was given out in my church by a dear sweet lady, years ago. I've kept it in my Bible and would love to share:... "Your Mother"... Your mother is always with you... She's the whisper of the leaves as you walk down the street;...she's the smell of bleach in your fresh laundered socks;... She's the cool hand on your brow when you're not well... Your mother lives inside your laughter, and she's crystallized in every teardrop... She's the place you came from,... your first home;... And she's the map you follow with every step you take... She's your first heartbreak... and nothing on earth can separate you...Not time...Not space...Not death!

4 comments:

  1. I was wondering how often you visit your Mom. I've been trying to go every day or at least every other day, but this past week she's been so ugly about everything. Going from room to room looking for someone to vouch for her to teach children; and then yesterday she turned on me and said I was being mean and talking ugly to her. I hadn't said anything but if she wanted to take a nap. So I didn't go today and may back off. What is your feelings about visiting them in a nursing home once the delusions are so strong?

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  2. Hi Judy...I started out visiting mother 3 or 4 times a week...now that she can't remember 5 seconds after I'm gone...I have cut down to once or twice per week...I have a sister that goes once a week and a brother that goes ever so often...I have just been diagnosed with breast cancer and have not had the thought to go but once in several weeks...so glad for dementia that mother doesn't have to grieve over my cancer...I have a good prognosis and will be having a mascectomy on Monday...prayers...Jean

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  3. Dear Jean, please write more stories. I remember some that your mother told us, especially the one about her falling into Uncle Will's hog pen. Does she ever talk about the past? If so, what does she talk about? When you are better, please remember as much as you can and write it down. You all are my last link to my own mother and I love to read your well written and heart warming remembrances. Not only do I enjoy your stories, but I believe it will help take your mind off your cancer. Love, Cousin Janie

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  4. Hi,

    I have a quick question for you regarding your blog, but I couldn't find your contact information. Do you think you could send me an email whenever you get a chance?

    Thanks,

    Cameron

    cameronvsj(at)gmail(dot)com

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